The following life events forced me to threaten the dental hygienist:
#1: I was early.
#2: She was late.
That’s all. But on the rare occasion when #1 does happen, my entire c’est la vie philosophy collapses and I focus, instead, on time wasted waiting at the dentist’s office. Let’s see, twice a year @ 10 minutes per visit… well, that’s time I could happily squander thinking about joining a gym, snacking while trying to figure out what to eat or looking for my keys. So I’m sure you understand my ire.
And so, after waiting a total of 25 minutes without being seen, it was time to pull out the big gun. Just one.
After inquiring about the delay, I simply told reception that I would be “over there, eating Oreos while I wait.”
I got a cleaning and X-rays right away without ever having to remove the lid from my coffee or unwrap the tuna sub.
Six months from now, I’m packing Double Stuff.
Fresh Air and Sarcasm 
Cheetos are a good second to Oreos, according to my hygenist…both?