On Why it’s Raining (Still)

7 Jun

blog image window screen

Why is the weather so horrible?

Because here’s why:

on the last blazing, hot and humid day to date (Saturday, June 1, but who’s keeping score?) I may have been crazy from the heat (bonus points if you noted the reference to David Lee Roth’s 1985 EP titled “Crazy from the Heat.”  And how do I know this?  It’s the EP on which he destroyed The Beach Boys “California Girls.” And when I say “destroyed” I mean “ruined” as in: “trashed,” “mocked” and “it’s no wonder he was busted buying a $5 bag of pot in Washington Square Park shortly thereafter; he stinks”) and I decided right then, on hot and humid Saturday, June 1, to put ALL the window screens in so that when the cool and dry breezes arrived, we would be able to partake of them.

And while I may have decided to install window screens immediately, I didn’t actually get to it until after I had coffee, yelled at The Boy and checked 6pm.com to see if any Kork-Ease sandals were on sale (because when the breezes do come, enjoying them in a lightweight and comfortable wedge is way more pleasant knowing that the shoes were 50% off (or more) with free shipping).

Note: yelling at The Boy is what happens on weekends when morning becomes afternoon and I have gotten nothing done and now it’s even hotter and all the funky, cheap Kork-Ease sandals are not available in size 9 but I have somehow convinced myself that a discounted BØRN or DANSKO sandal will be fine even though I know that they’re not as stylish and why is it so damn hot in here?

Update: it’s been rainy and cold since the screens went in.  It’s too soggy to wear the runner-up shoes, another weekend is upon us and I have a sore throat which means there will be limited yelling at The Boy.

I suppose I could check online to see if there are any snow tires on sale but the last time I bought snow tires and had them mounted, balanced and installed, we didn’t get snow for an entire winter, not even ice.

Also the tick population exploded, the plants all got sunburned and I didn’t wear the fabulous moonboots that I bought at Zappos.com even once.

I suppose if I want to make the sun come out, I just need to buy an umbrella.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: